The Adventures of Newkid
by Vospader21
Summary: Newkid is an orphan boy who's just discovered he has phenomenal magical abilities. But his pride, fierce independence, and distrust of everyone and everything keep him from joining a guild. Can the mages of Fairy Tail break through his shell before he decides to spend his life squandering his talent? LucyXLoke, NatsuXLisanna pairings in later chapters. Future Lemons
1. Our Story begins with a Mop and Bucket

**Disclaimer:** The following is fan generated content, created for recreational purposes only. Fairy Tail and all related media are intellectual property of master mangaka Hiro Mashima.

In a cute apartment building on Strawberry Street, a scraggly looking dark haired boy of no more than twelve trudges along the buildings halls. He's wearing a white apron over his t-shirt and trousers, and his forehead is covered by a handkerchief tied around his forehead. In his left hand there is a mop and in his right hand there's a bucket which is holding some soap and a brush.

He walked up to the apartment on the second floor. The door he was looking for had the name 'Lucy' written on the door. He knocked on it; "Coming!" answered an annoyingly chipper voice. The door opened to reveal a really cute blonde girl in her late teens. However what really caught the boys attention about this girl, were her amazing cantaloupe sized breasts. The girl caught the little boy staring, she snapped at him "hey eyes up here you little pervert."

The boy snapped back, "lady in case you haven't noticed, I'm only a little bit higher than your waist, the direction I'm looking in now is about as high as I can look."

"Whatever," she said disgruntled, "so what can I do for ya kid?"

He held up the mop and bucket, "I'm the new housekeeper."

"What? You're the new housekeeper the landlady was talking about. But you're just a…"

"A kid, yeah I know, that doesn't mean I don't know how to use a mop. Now you gonna let me do my job or what?"

The girl's eyes softened, if this boy was doing demeaning housework at such a young age, he must have been in some serious financial straits. "Sure come on in, I'm Lucy by the way."

"Yeah cool, where you want me to start?" The boy's voice was monotonous and annoyed.

_"Well that's a bit rude,"_ the girl thought to herself. "Um anywhere's fine, I just had the place cleaned up yesterday, so there isn't much to do."

The boy's eyebrow rose at this, "if you clean the place up yourself, why pay for housekeeping?"

"Well you see the thing is…"

"LUUUUUCCCCCYYYY!" A pink haired man covered in mud came barging through the window.

"WHAT THE HELL!" The little boy was so surprised he fell on his rear.

"Natsu calm down!" Lucy yelled.

The pink haired man shook himself like a dog, splattering mud everywhere. Lucy was furious, "what the hell Natsu? Why are you covered in mud!?"

"You would not believe the day I had today…"

"I don't care about your day! Look at the mess you've made!" Lucy's screech reached a demonic shrillness.

"Just listen," The man whose name was Natsu said. "I spent the day fighting Giant Dragon Boars."

"Giant Dragon Boars?" Lucy asked confused.

"Yeah, they're exactly what their names would make you think they are. They're these gigantic boars that can breathe fire. I had to wrestle with them in the swamps where they live, which is how I got so muddy, but it was a great time. The flames they made were delicious, and their meat tastes even better. And I managed to slaughter twelve of them, so there's enough meat for the whole guild. But you know how those guys get, even with all that meat, I doubt it'll last long, so you better hurry if you want a piece." Natsu put his arm around Lucy, and prepared to rocket out the window.

Lucy hesitated, "But wait Natsu, I'm not even HUUUNGGGRYYY!" They were out the window before she could object.

The boy examined the now muddy room. "I'm not really sure what just happened, but hey at least I got something to clean now." And so the boy set to work. He mopped, and he scrubbed, rubbed and he wiped. This went on for about an hour, and the effort tuckered the boy out. He was finished now, so he decided to take a break on the windowsill, the same one where Natsu and Lucy went flying out earlier. He untied the handkerchief from his forehead, and used it to wipe the sweat from his face and neck. He looked out the window, it was a pleasant sunny day; other kids his age were probably outside playing soccer or running around like idiots. _"Eh, screw what other kids are doing,"_ he thought to himself, _"I have a roof to keep over my head. Sure maybe I have to clean up other peoples shit to keep it, but at least as long as I have it no one can tell me what to do under it."_

Suddenly his stomach growled. _"Well I got a roof over my head, but no food in my belly. I should talk to the landlady, see if we can come to some kind of arrangement on that."_ The boy looked around the room and spotted the refrigerator. He walked over to it and looked inside. He pulled out a yogurt, and grabbed a spoon. _"Right now that ladies probably enjoying Giant Dragon Boar meat, I'm sure she won't miss one yogurt."_ He grabbed a spoon from the kitchen and started helping himself. He was about to have his third spoonful when he saw something that made his heart skip a beat. Down below walking across the stones of Strawberry Street, was a cute little girl about his age. She was a few inches shorter than him, she had peach colored skin, and wide sienna eyes, but her most distinctive feature was her cherry red hair that ran down her back in curling ponytail. _"Minnie"_

He set the yogurt on the nearby coffee table, and quickly ditched the white apron. He was about to run out the door, when he spotted the flower vase on a nearby stand. It was filled with pink heart shaped flowers that he didn't recognize, without thinking he picked one out of the vase and ran outside.

He scanned Strawberry Street up and down looking for the cherry haired girl. This only took a minute since her hair made her easy enough to find. "Hey, hey, Minnie!" The boy yelled after her.

The cherry haired girl looked back wondering who was calling her name. She spotted the boy, "Oh, Newkid!" She was clearly delighted to see him, as she dashed straight for him. "Where have you been?" she asked. "I was so worried when I heard you ran away from the orphanage. I asked father to look for you, but he hasn't done anything so far.

He gave her a cocky grin, "You don't have to worry about me Minnie, I can take care of myself."

"Should I take that to mean you're not going back to the orphanage?" She asked worried.

"The orphanage is for crybabies who think they need a family to survive in this world." He responded churlishly, "Besides there's no way in hell I'm letting that old crone beat me again."

"And just what do you plan to do for food, clothing, and shelter?" Minnie asked.

"I already have a job and a place to stay," he said.

"Really where are you staying?" she asked.

"See that building over there?" Newkid pointed to the apartment he just came out of.

"Yes?"

"Well, the landlady and I made a deal. If I help…maintain the place, I can live there rent free." He didn't want her to know that he had to scrub floors and toilets to keep a roof over his head.

"Really? Hmm," the doubt in her voice was palpable.

"Yup, that's right, I'm only twelve years old, and I'm already completely self-sufficient. The perfect example of that 'self-made man' your dads always talking about."

"Really, well, I guess I should wish you luck then. Anyway…see you some other time." She started to turn away from him.

"Minnie wait!" he called.

"Hmm?" she turned back.

"Um here, I got this for you." He held his hand out to offer her the heart shaped flower he plucked from the vase earlier.

"Oh," she accepted it gratefully, "Newkid, I love heart lilies, how did you know?"

_"So that's what it's called."_ He put his hand behind his head slightly embarrassed, "Um, I don't know, I just sort of saw the flower and thought of you."

She looked at the flower, then to him with a warm smile. "Listen I know you have certain issues with being in the company of rich people."

A stern look crossed his face as he admonished her, "They have issues with me, not the other way around."

"In any case, I would like it if you came to dinner."

"You sure? I mean won't your parents have a problem with having a street urchin soiling their golden table ware?"

She giggled, "oh please, gold is sooo last year, we use platinum now. But in all seriousness I really do want you to come over. We always make something extra nice when we have guests over. And my dad will be really impressed with how well you're doing for yourself."

Newkid thought it over, _"Okay, this is both good and bad. Good because I get to spend time with Minnie, bad because it has to be in the company of her family. I don't want to have to do a dog and pony show to impress her parents, and if that bastard brother of hers is gonna be there then that's just asking for trouble."_

"I'll be there," he answered.

She smiled cheerfully at him, "great, I'll see you there." And she walked away.

He walked back to the apartment, went down into his sparse room in the basement, locked the door behind, and then screamed, "YEEEESSSSSS!"

* * *

**A/N: Thanks for reading. I'm really hoping this turns out to be my big break on fanfiction. If I made any grammar or spelling mistakes please let me know so I can fix them. And please review. Thank you.**


	2. The Portal to Hell

Newkid was lying on his mat, and just staring at the ceiling. "Man this place is boring, what do you think Bear?" Newkid posed his question to a ragged little stuffed bear that was lying next to him on the mat. "That's a good point; we do get what we pay for." Newkid spoke to the toy bear as if it had just spoken to him. Newkid sat up straight on the mat and examined his basement room. The walls were made of grey cinder brick, and the floor was made of rough grey stone. The room was lit by a single light bulb that was suspended from the ceiling, and besides the one mattress that he kept in a corner of the room, it was completely empty. There was a bathroom but it had no bath or shower, just a sink and toilet. There were however two redeeming qualities about these accommodations. One it was spacious, if it was better furnished two people could have lived here comfortably. And also it was clean, make no mistake the place was dusty and had cobwebs all over the place, but Newkid scrubbed and swept every inch of it vigorously, now there wasn't a single speck of dust in the place.

He got up, and continued speaking to the toy bear. "I gotta tell ya Bear, all things considered, things are really looking up. Yeah I practically live in a hole in the ground, but anything beats the orphanage, and here at least no one can beat me."

He walked over to the bathroom, and looked at himself in the mirror, "oh I forgot to mention this earlier, but I got a date with Minnie. No I didn't ask her out, she invited me to come over for dinner…. yes her parents are going to be there, but the point is I get to see her. Yeah I know I'll also have to deal with her brother, but I doubt he'll try anything with his dad right in front of him."

The bear had been inanimate, yet Newkid continued to attribute emotion to it, speaking to it as though with every line he finished the bear snapped back with a cynical comment. "My clothes aren't stained or too dusty, if I wash my hair I should be presentable. Hey you know I don't have any other clothes. There are not a million ways this can go wrong! Okay, at most there are half a dozen ways this can go wrong. Look Bear I'm trying to build a life for myself, why can't you just support me?" He walked back over to the mattress and loomed over the stuffed bear, he peered into its black beady eyes, and anger seeped into his own. "You know what shut up! Who asked you anyway!?" He pulled a blanket over the stuffed animal. "Hmm, it's getting close to sunset, I should head out."

* * *

"YOOOOSSSHHH!" Natsu screamed, "THAT WAS THE BEST BBQ EVER!" He walked down the street, holding his stomach which was now as bloated as beach ball. Lucy walked next to him, though her stomach was not quite as comically bloated, she still held it like it was about to burst. She groaned, "Natsu stop yelling, all that noise is going to make me puke."

"Aye, Lucy ate pigs like a pig," chirped the chipper-cute voice of an adorable blue cat that was riding on Natsu's shoulder.

"Don't be so vulgar Happy," Lucy snapped back with a bug-eyed look on her face. "It's just that that meat was really spicy, and my poor delicate stomach can't handle such acidity."

"That didn't stop you from having four helpings off it," sneered a dark haired boy who wasn't wearing a shirt.

"Oh don't be so mean Gray," said a smooth voice. An orange haired man, wearing a green coat and glasses, seemingly appeared out of nowhere and wrapped his arms around Lucy. "My precious _LUCY_ is a growing girl who needs lots of protein to grow big and strong."

Lucy reacted to the smooth talking man with discomfort, "Loke you're too close, and you're talking kind of creepy. And Gray you're not wearing a shirt."

"WHAT!?" Gray looked down at his own body to see she was right, "Dammit it happened again, well at least I still have my pants." As he said this he was methodically stripping off his pants.

"GRAY! WE'RE IN PUBLIC!" Everyone yelled in unison.

"Dammit!" He yelled, he quickly pulled his pants back up.

Lucy sighed and shook her head, "Geeze, there is never a quiet moment with you guys is there?"

"We're Fairy Tail!" Natsu yelled, "THE GREATEST GUILD IN THE WORLD! You don't get to be the greatest guild in the world by being quiet Lucy."

"Aye!" Happy agreed.

"Don't encourage him Happy," Lucy looked despondent.

"Oh don't be so melodramatic my dear Lucy. Natsu's just happy to be having a good time," Loke said grinning as he carried Lucy bridal style, which she just now noticed he was doing.

"Eh! Loke put me down!" She banged her hands against his chest.

"Awww," he bemoaned, "as my master commands," now it was his turn to be despondent.

She grunted, "God, sometimes it's like I'm the only normal person in the whole guild."

"Only sometimes?" Gray asked.

"You're right I'm the only normal person in the guild," she giggled heartily.

"If you're the only normal person, then that technically makes you the freak in the guild," Loke grinned.

"Aye, and I thought Natsu was the guy who specialized in burns," Happy said. Everyone laughed, they knew what was said was all in good fun.

"You know it really has been a good day," Loke said.

"I know what you mean," Lucy said, "at Fairy Tail grim life and death scenarios are a regular occurance. Strong wizards always pop in from out of the blue to cause trouble with us or other people who need our help, so days like this when we can have fun without any trouble happening are pretty sweet."

"Ahh, it can't be helped," Natsu said, "Fairy Tail is the strongest guild in the world. And when you're the strongest in the world, other people will fight you because they also wanna be the strongest in the world."

"I know," Lucy said, "I'm not complaining or anything like that, I'm just trying to be appreciative."

"Hey you think it'll always be like this?" Loke asked.

"What do you mean?" Natsu asked.

"I mean the Guild, do you think it can be the way it is forever, do you think we can always keep together our family mentality?" Loke asked.

Natsu answered eyebrows raised, "Are you asking if we'll always be family? That's gotta be the dumbest thing I've ever heard, of course we'll always be family."

"Sorry I guess I phrased that question wrong, what I'm trying to ask is what do you think the future of the guild is? I mean I know it doesn't seem likely to happen anytime soon, but the master will have to step down one day. And someone from the next generation will have to take his place."

Lucy spoke, "Well right now there's no one who can match the master. But if we're thinking long term, I think it'll either be Erza or Macao who becomes the next Guildmaster."

Gray was curious about Lucy's choice. "Erza I understand but why Macao? I mean he's pretty strong and all, but he hasn't shown signs of developing in years."

Lucy answered him, "maybe so, but you're forgetting that Macao is a mature and responsible adult. And on top of that he's an excellent father figure, just ask Romeo."

Loke responded to Lucy's analysis, "When you put it that way even I can see Macao in the guildmaster's position. But still all things considered I'd put my money on Erza. I mean she's already so strong, and yet she still has room to grow. Can you imagine what she'll be like in ten years?"

An image of a demonic Erza with gorgon hair and forked tongue, flashed through the collective imaginations of Natsu and Gray, causing both to shudder. "I'd rather not," Natsu and Gray said in unison.

"You'd rather not what?" Came a strong feminine voice. The group turned to spot a gorgeous women, with scarlet red hair, and a bosom more bountiful than Lucy's.

"Erza!" Natsu and Gray yelped in unison yet again.

"Hey Erza," Lucy greeted, "we were just talking about you."

"Oh? About what?" She asked.

"The future of the guild," Loke answered, "Lucy thinks that when the master finally steps down, either you or Macao will succeed him."

Erza blushed a little at this, "well thanks for the compliment Lucy, but I think Macao is the better choice. I don't know if I'm the right person to be the guildmaster."

"Why's that?" Loke asked.

"Well think about it, Master Makarov acts like a father to us all. That's the reason why Fairy Tail is able to be the great big extended family that it is. The guildmaster needs to be someone who can be a good parent figure. Macao's already a parent, and from what I can see he's a damn good one."

"You know that's the same thing I said about Macao," Lucy said, "you're really more like an authoritative older sister, right Erza?"

"Older sister, yeah that sounds more like me." Erza turned to Natsu and Gray, and gave them a sardonic grin, "Doesn't it Natsu? Gray?"

Natsu gulped, "oh yeah you're definitely an older sister."

"Uh huh, you're the best older sister in the world," Gray answered shaking.

Erza's grin turned from sardonic to demonic. "That's right, now the two of you hug, like loving brothers should."

"WHAT!" The two yelped once again in perfect unison. "Oh come Erza be reasonable," Gray begged. Having to hug Natsu would hands down be the single most degrading thing he could ever do, and considering the fact that Gray was a guy who had a bad habit of stripping at random, that was really saying something.

Magic flashed in Erza's hand, and she ex-quipped an ornate menacing battle-axe, which she balanced threateningly. "Do it," she warned.

Natsu and Gray looked at each other with true despondency in their souls. They knew there was no way out of this, so they sucked in their chests, swallowed their pride, opened their arms wide, and started to lean in towards each other. And then the sounds of fighting broke out.

* * *

On the stones of Strawberry Street a nasty schoolyard scrap was about to go down. Newkid was surrounded by four older boys. _"Damnit, Minnie's brother must have sent these bastards."_

"Mr. Manerri has a message for you," one of the boys said, "you are never to see Mineneria Manerri again."

Newkid got into an amateur fighting stance. "He's calling himself Mr. Manerri now huh? Well you can tell 'Mr. Manerri' that he can jack off, and if I wanna see his sister he can't stop me."

One of the teen thugs cracked his knuckles and said, "I was hoping you'd say that. Mr. Manerri also said that if you weren't compliant, we could beat the crap out of..." Newkid's fist went straight into the punks face before he could finish his sentence.

The punk was on the ground and his nose was bleeding. The others didn't wait for an order, they dove straight in. The brawl was on in half a second. Newkid fought with all his tenacity. He dove under the fist of one the thugs and shot straight up with a strong uppercut, which he combined with a knee to the groin. The thug was down instantly, but Newkid didn't have a chance to acknowledge his victory because another teen punched him in the back. The hit knocked him off balance and destroyed his guard, leaving him open to the knee-he couldn't tell where it came from-that went into his stomach.

He was on the ground. He had been in this position before, and knew that the teen thugs being the cowards that they were would kick him while he was down, and so he curled into a fetal position. And right as rain, the bullies started kicking him. He endured the barrage, and bided his time, the fetal position helping to keep the damage off his more vulnerable areas. He took the kicks in his back and in his arms for several minutes before he finally saw the opening he needed. He swung his leg out and spun on his side by a full three-hundred sixty degrees, sweeping all four of his enemies to the ground at once. He got back on his feet, but only for a moment, before he dove onto the punk whose nose he'd bloodied earlier. He let his fists go loose on the bastards face. Teeth and bones crunched, and blood flowed freely. Newkid had just landed a shot on the thugs left eye, when he was pulled off him, by two of the other thugs. They held him up by his arms and a third one started punching Newkid in the gut. Newkid choked up blood as blow after blow was ingrained into his torso.

"Enough!" Ordered one of the thugs, it was the same thug whose face Newkid was pummeling earlier. His teeth were broken, his left eye was already swelling, and blood flowed from places one would not think blood could flow.

The thug that was hitting Newkid obeyed and stepped aside; the two thugs that were holding him up dropped him like a sack of potatoes and also stepped aside. The battered thug reached into his pocket and pulled out what looked like a party popper. He held it up, "this here's a Bottled Fireball. It's a pretty dangerous piece of holder magic, so dangerous in fact the magic council banned it, all you gotta do is yank on the string and out pops a fireball big enough to burn down a forest. And you don't even need to be a wizard to use it. It was pricey so I was saving it for a special occasion, but after what you did to my handsome face I'll make an exception."

The thug aimed the party popper like weapon at Newkid, and stretched the string to a yanking position. One of the other thugs spoke up, "hey the job was to just scare the kid, and whoop him a little if necessary, not kill."

"Shut the fuck up! Like hell if I'm letting this little shit get away with what he did to my face." The teenage thugs collectively decided it was better not to piss of their friend so long as he had a dangerous weapon in hand, so they stepped back.

Newkid in the meanwhile, had the crud so badly beaten out of him, he couldn't move. All he could do was sit straight up on his knees and look at his enemy, with eyes fogged over with fatigue and blood mixed with saliva drooling down his chin.

The thug holding the Bottled Fireball laughed maniacally, "SO LONG NEWKID!" He yanked the string, and out burst forth a great red fireball. Newkid looked into the pulsating red orb and its weaving flames as it grew larger and closer. He had time for just a few more thoughts, _"is this the portal to hell? It must be, after all that's where that bitchy old crone said I was going. Heh, I'll bet after they find my corpse, Sister Hagus is going to use me as an example of what happens to kids who runaway. So much for becoming a beacon of hope for orphans everywhere. Damn I really should_ _have listened to Bear."_ His last thoughts were of an adorable cherry haired girl that had him so infatuated, _"Minnie, I don't blame you for this, please don't blame yourself."_ He closed his eyes and waited for the heat to wash over him.

"BOOM!" The sounds of impact ran throughout the area but Newkid felt no burning. He opened his eyes, and saw that the fireball was inert. Standing between him and the burning red orb that Newkid had just a moment ago deemed the portal to hell, was a single man with pink hair and a scaly scarf.

The pink haired man looked at Newkid and grinned, "I saw you fight kid. Not many would try to take four thugs on all by themselves, especially not kids. I gotta say you got spunk."

Newkid looked at the man a little closer, "hey wait a minute I know you, you're that guy from earlier who spattered mud all over the blonde ladies apartment. Natsu!" The next thing Newkid noticed was that Natsu was holding back the fireball with a single bare hand. "What the!? How are you doing that?"

"Doing what?" Natsu asked.

"That! Holding back the freaking portal to hell."

"The portal to hell?" Natsu looked at it bemused, "looks like a regular fireball to me." Then he did the inconceivable. Natsu put his second hand on the fireball, lifted it up and started sucking it in like it was spaghetti.

Newkids eyes popped in surprise, "WHAT THE HELL!? Are you eating a freaking fireball?"

Natsu sucked the whole thing in and burped. "Well I'm the Dragon Slayer of fire aren't I? It's only natural that I eat fire," Natsu said this as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, Newkid of course had no idea what he was talking about.

"Natsu he has no idea who you are," came a familiar girl's voice. Newkid looked to his left to see Lucy and a couple of other people approaching.

"Hey you're that Lady who lives in that apartment," he noted.

"And you're the kid who came to clean it, how did you get into such a mess?" Lucy asked.

"Umm…" he tried to respond.

"He can give us the details later, for now let's teach these punks a lesson." Natsu slammed his fist into his palm, and flames erupted from the impact. Closing in came a scarlet haired lady wielding a battle-axe, a shirtless dark haired man with a spear made of ice, and an orange haired man with light in his hands. Natsu grinned some more, "don't worry kid you fought bravely, we'll handle the rest."

* * *

It was over in a second, Loke hit the teenage punks with some swift Regulus strikes and they were each battered, bruised, and out cold.

Natsu was disappointed. "Wait that's it? Geeze and the kid was fighting them so hard, I actually thought I'd get the chance to burn off all the food in my belly."

"Natsu focus, right now we need to make sure the boy's ok," Erza said.

"Can you walk?" Lucy asked the boy.

The boy struggled at first, his injuries clearly weighing him down, but he trooped through the worst of it and got back on his feet.

Natsu grinned at him, "see I told ya, this kids got spunk."

"Aye!" Happy-who was now on Natsu's shoulder-agreed.

"We have to see to those wounds," Erza said.

She tried to approach the little boy, but he pushed her away grunting, "get away from me." Everyone stared in shock; no one ever treated Erza with that kind of disrespect. Erza on the other hand could see the boy was not in an interactive state of mind, so she motioned to the others to give the boy some space.

He hobbled over to the Strawberry Street canal, and looked at his reflection in the water. "Ok it's not too bad, it doesn't look like anything broke, and I can wash the blood off, but my clothes are ruined. Damn what am I gonna do?" He spoke more to himself than to the group. He scooped up some water and started washing his face with it.

Everyone was curious about the boy's behavior, but no one was sure how to approach him. Finally Lucy spoke up, "hey kid…you really shouldn't wash your face with canal water, there's no telling what's in it."

He didn't answer; he just finished washing the blood off and got back up. Then he started hobbling down the street. "Hey kid!" Gray yelled after him, "you should come with us; we can help treat your wounds."

The boy eyed the group with suspicion-understandable considering his recent ordeal, despite the fact that these people just saved him-and when he was done inspecting them, he took a deep breath and spoke, "thanks for the offer, and for saving my life, but I've got somewhere to be right now, so I can't go with you anywhere."

Lucy was curious, "somewhere to be? Where do you have to be that takes precedence over getting treatment?"

He just looked at her and shrugged, "I have a date."

* * *

**A/N:** Thanks for reading. Anyway if this ends up getting any attention at all, then I imagine some eyebrows will be raised at my 'creative' use of the hyphen. I use it to add additional details to describe a particular moment in the story when said detail cannot stand in its own sentence, as you can plainly see. This technique is actually employed by Franz Kafka in "The Metamorphosis" which is where I got the idea from. I figured if Kafka could get away with so can I, yes I'm perfectly aware of how egotistical that is. Anyway please review, and if you have questions (which I'm really hoping you do, because if you have questions that means I can PM you and we can start having conversations and discussions and quickly become internet buddies :D ) feel free to ask.


	3. Newkid has a Weak Spot for Red Hair

Lucy was incredulous. "A date!? You're ignoring the fact that you're battered and bruised for a date?"

Natsu laughed, "Haha, not only does this kid have spunk, he's got balls too."

"Aye" Happy agreed.

Loke broke into a dramatic monologue. "A man set on a quest for love is not easily deterred. For you see hard men are not easily swept away by the hurricane of love. But when they are they will fly its torrential winds, and refuse to be blown to the ground until they have found their way into the calm and peaceful eye of the storm. Now go young man, go and ride the hurricane of love, and know that the best wishes of another who flies in a similar storm goes with you."

Everyone stopped and stared at Loke as he made his overly dramatic soliloquy. Lucy in particular was so enraptured by it, that a full minute had passed before she realized that Loke was carrying her bridal style again. "Eh! Loke put me down!" She squealed as she banged her fist against Loke's chest and back.

The boy in the meantime was still hobbling his way forward, he didn't stop to look back at the Fairy Tail groups antics. Loke noticed that the boy was wearing a t-shirt and trousers, both of which where tattered from the fighting earlier. "Hey kid you don't plan to go on a date looking like that do you?"

This made the boy turn around. He spoke back with sarcasm laced with acidity, "Well the thing is my dry cleaner up and destroyed my hand tailored suit, I don't suppose you have an extra you could lend me, cheh." He turned back and continued walking; truth was the clothes on he was wearing where the only clothes he had in the world, he ran away from the orphanage with literally nothing but the clothes on his back, but there was no way in hell he was going to tell these people, last thing he needed was to be mocked, or worse yet pitied, after all he already owed these people a debt for saving his life, if they gave him anymore help he'd be further in their power.

"We should help him," Erza said.

"I agree, there is no chance that boy will appeal to any ladies in that state," Loke said, still holding a complaining Lucy.

"Yosh, a tough kid like that is a kid I wanna be friends with," Natsu roared.

"Normally I'd say this isn't any of my business, but that kids pretty beaten up," Gray said.

"Aye, Gray can't ignore a child in need," said a hovering Happy.

"Buzz off you!" Gray said to Happy, sending him the angry eyes. He never did like Happy's tendency to say things as they were.

"I actually vaguely know that kid," Lucy said. "He works as a housekeeper for my apartment."

"Don't you have Virgo to take care of cleaning?" Loke asked.

"Yeah, but she's not available on Sundays. And with Natsu and Happy constantly barging in and making a mess of things I could use all the help I could get."

"If we're gonna help him we should catch up to him," Gray said.

"Right!" Everyone else said in unison. They chased after him.

* * *

Newkid heard most of the conversation the group of mages-he decided that's what they had to have bin in order to save his life in the way that they did-who saved his life were having. He hated being in debt, because being in debt meant someone having power over him, and he refused to let anyone have power over him, that's what the whole stunt off running away from the orphanage was about in the first place. He turned around again and yelled, "SERIOUSLY DON'T YOU PEOPLE HAVE ANYTHING BETTER TO DO THAN TO BOTHER ME!"

"NOPE!" They all shouted back.

Newkid could only hobble along his wounds were seriously slowing him down. Suddenly he felt a pair of hands grab his torso and lift him up. "Hey put me down!" He screamed. The women who was lifting him up didn't listen instead she raised him over her head, and seated him on her neck, before he realized it he was gripping on to her scarlet red hair for support. When he saw he was so close to such luscious fiery red hair he was completely quiet. In his mind he was screaming, _"damn my goddamn weakness for redheads!"_

"There, that's better than walking around while you're injured isn't it?" The scarlet haired lady asked. "I'm Erza" she said.

"You already know me I'm Lucy," said the blonde lady.

"I'm Leo but my friends call me Loke," said the orange haired man with glasses.

"Gray," introduced the shirtless man.

"Raww," the pink haired man breathed out a plume of fire, "And I'm Natsu the Salamander, Dragon Slayer of Fire, and strongest mage in..."

"Careful how you finish that sentence Natsu," Erza said.

Natsu boastfulness visibly dissipated at Erza's command, "in my age-group? Haha."

"Really now cause last I checked that title belongs to me," Gray said angrily. He got up in Natsu's face almost as if to challenge him.

Natsu got angry in turn, "and last I checked fire melts ice."

"I'm surprised you know that considering the fact that your head is full of hot air."

"Better a head full of air, then full of perverted thoughts like yours."

"Who're you calling a pervert?"

"I'm calling the pathological stripper in front of me a pervert."

"Don't worry they fight like this all the time," said a blue cat with wings. _"Wait a minute a blue cat with wings!" _Newkid looked at the blue cat and his eyes popped in surprise. "Oh and my names Happy pleasure to meet you." The blue cat whose name was Happy extended a hand or a paw, or whatever the appendage could have been called out to Newkid, who accepted.

"So what's your name kid?" Loke asked.

"Newkid," he answered.

Loke, Lucy, and Happy looked at him incredulously, they couldn't tell if he was being sarcastic, lying, or actually telling the truth. "Seriously? That your name?" Loke asked.

Newkid sighed, "it's the closest thing to a name that I have."

"What do you mean?" Lucy asked.

"It's a long story," he answered.

"You can tell us later then" Erza said. Then she looked at Natsu and Gray who were breaking in to a slap fight, "cut it out you two," she ordered firmly, "it's time to get this show on the road. So Newkid which way to that date you were so eager to get to?"

"Is there anyway I can convince you to put me down and let me be on my way?"

"No," she answered.

"Why? What does it matter to you people? Listen if you're expecting payment or favors or something to compensate you afterwards, you should know that I don't have anything of value."

"Just shut up and accept our help already." This blunt comment came from Natsu who was just beginning a dramatic monologue of his own. "What's that crap about not having anything to pay us with? Did we ask for anything? We're helping you because we want to help you; because we admired the courage you showed; because we can't turn our backs on a kid in need; because all in all it's just the right thing to do. If helping a person in need and doing the right thing is within your power then the natural response would be to do what you can to help. And in our case there's nothing we can't do," he raised up his left arm to expose the mark on his shoulder, "because we are, FAIRY TAIL MADOUSHI!"

* * *

**A/N:** Okay, I'll admit it; sneaking in that one bit of Japanese at the end was kind of cheap. It's just that I was planning to write we are Fairy Tail Wizards, and every time I thought about that, I pictured Natsu in my head going "We are Fairy Tail Wizards!" And it sounded correct, but it wasn't nearly as epic as whenever I hear someone say, "Fairy Tail no Madoushi!" and then watch as they completely obliterate the bad guy. So I've decided to make it my policy to only use the word madoushi during dramatic speeches.


	4. Where are your parents?

"So which way kid?" Natsu asked.

"Blueberry Street," Newkid answered.

The party set off, Newkid rode on Erza's shoulders without complaint. He didn't feel like talking, yet a certain over romantic celestial spirit insisted on asking him questions. "So Newkid this date of yours, is she pretty?" Loke asked. Newkid didn't say anything. "She must be, if you're willing to endure those wounds to see her. So then is this casual date or do you need dress formally, if you need a suit I can furnish one that's just your size in instantly, really it's no trouble at all." Newkid still didn't say anything.

It was Gray who finally said something useful, "Loke shut up, you're annoying the brat."

Newkid snapped at Gray for that comment, "Who you calling a brat pervert?"

Gray snapped back, "who you calling a pervert BRAT?"

"I'm calling the guy with no shirt or pants a pervert, PERVERT!"

"No pants?" He looked down, to see that he was wearing nothing but his chain and boxers, "Damnit not again!"

Erza shot Gray a fierce death glare, and a menacing demonic aura seemed to surround her. "Seriously striping in public!? Can you possibly humiliate us further!? You're lucky I have Newkid on my back right now, or I'd give you pounding so hard your clothes would be glued to your skin with your own blood." She cracked her knuckles as she said this. "Instead I'm going to give you till the count of three to go back and pick up your clothes. One...'

Gray didn't even need to wait for Erza to get to two, he bolted right then and there, running so fast he left a dust trail in his wake. Everybody laughed, even Newkid, unfortunately.

"Hahaha," Newkid's laugh was hearty and innocent, a small inkling of the child within him that he'd worked so hard to keep suppressed. His laugh was so heartwarming that everyone diverted their eyes to him with smiles on their faces. It was a minute before he caught himself, "damnit!"

Lucy smiled at him and playfully mussed up his hair, "aww, for such a serious little kid you have a very cute laugh you know."

Newkid shut back up, and screwed the scowl back on his face. "Oh don't be that way, it's good to laugh and smile, especially when you're surrounded by friends."

"Friends? You don't know anything about me you…" Newkid searched his imagination for the best insult he could think off, "orange sea urchin."

A wave of shock ran through Loke, before it sank into everyone else what Newkid had just said. "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" The laughter went off like fireworks.

"Loke's hair is orange, and it's spiky like a sea urchin," Happy explained.

"I think we get it Happy, hahahaa," Natsu said between laughs.

The only one who wasn't laughing was Loke, who frowned at Newkid, "just for that I'm not lending you one of my suits."

Lucy saw that Loke was upset, so she gave him a sweet kiss on the cheek to cheer him up, "ahh, come on Loke be a sport. Besides we're not laughing because his insult is accurate, we're laughing because it's just so hilariously bad. I mean seriously, orange sea urchin? Where do you get something like that?"

Loke in the meanwhile was just ecstatic to have gotten a kiss from Lucy, "YOSH! TO MAKE LUCY HAPPY I WILL ENDURE ANY INSULT!"

Newkid in the meantime buried himself in Erza's luscious scarlet hair, too embarrassed by his botched insult to face everyone. The Fairy Tail bunch on the other hand just continued laughing as they walked along to Blueberry Street.

"You know you made a good point earlier Newkid," Erza said.

He didn't look up, he just grunted, "hmm?"

"You said we don't know anything about you, so...tell us."

"No," he answered bluntly.

"Oh come one," Lucy begged, "you'll never make friends if you keep closing yourself off."

He finally lifted his head up, "friends are for people who can't stand on their own."

"You mean like you right now?" Loke asked sarcastically.

"Shut up, I never asked for your help in the first place."

"Honestly kid what happened to you to make you so freakin bitter?" Natsu asked nonchalantly, while simultaneously picking his nose.

"What happened to you to make you start sticking your nose in my business instead of using it to give your fingers a workout?" He grinned at this line then thought himself,_ "Haha! Perfect comeback! Newkid you nailed it again."_

"Do you honestly have to have a snappy comeback for every question someone asks you?" Loke was getting annoyed at Newkid's attitude. "Seriously what kind of manners did your parents teach you?"

Newkid immediately clammed up at the mention of parents. His unease was discernable by everyone. "I struck a nerve didn't I?" Loke asked, almost ashamed.

Lucy started puzzling things together. "Hmm, come to think of it, it did cross my mind that you had to be in some kind of financial problem if you were already working as housekeeper at such a young age. Do you have an unstable living situation at home?"

Newkid went back to being quiet again. "Do your parents argue a lot at home?" Lucy asked. Still he remained quiet, a shadow of anger and sadness cast by his raven colored bangs masked his face. "Do they not pay attention or care for you?" she asked. Still no answer. "Newkid? Are they dead?" Tension was clearly building in his body, the frustration and urge to confess were clawing for a way out, but still he sat on Erza's shoulders completely silent.

Finally Erza asked him, "Newkid, where are your parents?"

"I DON'T FUCKING KNOW OK!" His scream was so shrill, so angry, the very seemed to swirl in response.

Everyone was quiet for a minute then Natsu spoke. "What do you mean you don't know?" It was Natsu who asked this, his tone contained the rare seriousness that only came forward when he was speaking about a heavy subject.

Newkid reached into his pants pocket, and pulled out a neatly folded note that was a bit frayed around the edges. He handed it to Natsu who unfolded it and perused. He shook his head, disgruntled at what he was reading. "What's it say?" Lucy asked.

"Here," Natsu passed it to her. When she was done she passed it to Loke, who after reading it passed it to Erza. And in this way all the present Fairy Tail mages viewed the sad and cryptic note that read...

Sorry but now you have to make your own way in the world. But here's some essentials.

Your birthday is whatever today happens to be.

Your blood-type is AB+

You're six years old.

You have no family.

You have no name.

Everyone was quiet for a minute before Erza finally asked, "what is this?"

"The only link I have to my 'parents' if I have any at all. The very first memory I have is waking up in an alley on the east side of town. I had no clue where I was, or who I was, and the only thing I had to explain it to me was that note, which I found in my pocket when I woke up. Anyway some adults found me and brought me to an orphanage where I spent the last six years of my life. Since I didn't have a name everyone just kept calling me the new kid, and finally it just compounded into what became my name, Newkid"

Lucy caught something in his speech, "spent?" she asked.

"I ran away last week, I got fed up with being treated like shit. So I left, now I'm trying to etch out an honest living for myself, without having to rely on anyone else's charity."

It finally dawned on Lucy, "and that's why you're working as a housekeeper!"

"Yeah, the landlady wanted to send me back to the orphanage, but she said she admired my will to be independent, so we struck a deal. I'll clean the apartment for the tenants, and she'll let me live in the basement rent free."

"That's it just free rent? You're not actually getting paid?" Lucy asked.

"Naw, the landlady says she can't afford to pay me, the tenants only pay an extra 200 jewels each to have my services added to their rent, so it's not enough to earn me a payroll."

"What do you do for food?" Lucy asked.

"I haven't worked that part out yet," he answered.

"What about clothing?" Loke asked.

"I haven't **worked** that part out yet," he answered more annoyed this time.

"You really should have thought this through," Lucy said.

"DAMNIT DON'T YOU THINK I KNOW THAT!? I'M NOT STUPID!"

"Ok geeze, calm down." Lucy said, gesturing for him to cool down.

"Sorry, but you've got no idea what it's like to be treated like you don't matter, and yet watched and corralled like a sheep. At the orphanage they like to venerate how we're all weeds and urchins, gutted out and tossed away, and that it's only by god's good grace that we survive. I just can't stand the idea of being so weak that I have to pray to some control freak in the sky everyday just so that I could get some bread and porridge. And what's more even if I got adopted and some nice family took me away from all that, it would still be the same scenario, I'd still have to depend on someone else to sustain myself... Do you have any idea what it's like to see the disappointment in a kid's face when he finds out that he was passed over for adoption because someone else was cuter or younger than him? Well I do, I saw it in the faces of every kid who got his hopes when a nice looking couple came in looking to adopt, and these kids, many of them had been at the orphanage as long as me, some even longer, they somehow kept it in their heads that just maybe they were gonna get lucky, just maybe all the patient waiting they did would finally pay off, and then, they get crushed when they see that the new baby that arrived just a week ago is already on its way out. And the whole time I'm just thinking what's the big deal anyway? Why do you think you need parents to survive? You have two feet don't you? You have two hands don't you? Can't you just work to be able to live on your own? I asked one of the sisters that question and she just shrugged me off and said it was because we were children. And I thought that that was one of the biggest pieces of bullshit I ever heard. Just because I'm young means I can't take care of myself? So I left, I left behind 'god's good grace', I left behind those sad disappointed faces, and I left behind that teasing redundant concept of parenthood."

* * *

**A/N:** Ok so I was actually planning to have Newkid and Minnie's dinner date in this chapter, and end it with a cool fight scene. But somehow it just took on a life of its own. I honestly do not know how I got to this point, but I cannot tell you how much I love it. I wrote Newkid's monologue and realized, "I have to stop it here. This speech is amazing, a single word after this and it's ruined." So anyway I hope the lack of action in this chapter doesn't put you off from the story. The next chapter will have an awesome fight scene I promise.


	5. Handsome? Dapper? Dashing? Elegant?

Everyone was quiet, the enormity of Newkid's words weighing in on them. They just stood there, quiet, quiet, and then it registered. "OH YOU POOR THING!" everyone cried unison. Before Newkid realized it, Erza was clutching him to her chest, suffocating him against her cold armor. He squirmed in her grasp while Erza cried like a fountain, Lucy quickly joining in the hugging. Natsu and Happy were sobbing silently into their forearms, even Loke let a few man tears loose.

"Grawh, greh," Newkid was struggling to form words, but couldn't with his face pressed against Erza's armor. Erza, realising this, finally pulled him off of her to give him some air. His eyes glared angrily. "What the hell is with all the crying!?"

Erza wiped her tears away. "I'm sorry, it's just that your story is so sad, all of us here are orphans ourselves, but we at least knew our parents for a time. But you, you never had anybody...and that's just so sad." she replied.

A comically large bead of sweat dripped down Newkid's forehead "Didn't I just say that it's not a big deal?"

"Kid, I think you have the wrong view about what parents are for." Loke said.

"What are you talking about? Parents are basically just adults that kids rely on for sustenance." Newkid said with unshakeable belief.

"Well, yeah. There is that, but parents also act as important role models. They teach you right from wrong, and how to live life." Loke said lecturing.

"Yeah, like how Igneel taught me how to always live life being strong. STRONG!" Natsu yelled, then breathed out fire.

Newkid looked at Natsu, confused. "Who the hell is Igneel? You know what? It doesn't matter. I've got to get going." Newkid started walking off on his own, trying to leave the group behind.

"Hold up! You're not going anywhere without us, kiddo." Natsu said. And so the group followed him to Blueberry Street.

* * *

They walked for several minutes before reaching the entrance to Blueberry Street. It was a very posh neighborhood each house on the street, was in fact a manse that encompassed a considerable amount of ground. Each manor differed in design, but they all gave of the same aura of wealth and luxury. There was no doubt that this was the rich people's part of town, and to top it all off, the rich people had the gall to gate the whole damn street away. A large metal gate guarded by two men with spears barred entrance into the street, the gate was mirrored by its sister on the adjacent equally gaudy Mulberry Street. Even the canal that ran between the two neighborhoods was sluiced off.

Natsu stared at the ritzy neighborhood in awe. "Woah, now those are big houses. I had no clue there was a place like this in Magnolia."

Newkid walked up to the guards. "Halt! Who goes there?" he ordered more than asked.

"I got invited to have dinner here at the Manneri's." Newkid responded.

"Name?" The guard asked, reaching for a clip board.

"Newkid." he answered.

"Oh, so you're Newkid. Funny story, your invitations been cancelled."

"Huh? What are you talking about? Minnie Manneri invited me herself."

"We know. Little Minnie told us earlier that you were coming, but then the Manneri's butler came by and told us not to let you through." The guard pointed his spear at Newkid. "So that's basically it. You can't go in."

"What?" Newkid gritted his teeth, "Damnit, this must be her brother's doing. Why is he trying so hard to make sure I don't reach this dinner? Damnit, looks like I'm gonna have to fight my way through."

Newkid prepared to get into a fighting stance when Erza stepped forward. "Is there a problem here?" she asked.

The guards flinched at her appearance. "Eh! Miss Erza!"

"I have business here. Let us pass." she ordered.

They saluted her. "Right away!" One of them put a key in the lock, and the other pulled the gate open.

She curtly thanked them as she walked through and motioned for everyone else to follow. Newkid tried to follow, but a guard got in his way. "Hey, no one said you could pass!"

"The boy's with me. Leave him alone." Erza commanded.

"Ah, yes right away, Miss Erza." The guard stepped away from Newkid and bowed to her.

Everyone passed through the gate without further incident. "Wow, Erza, those guys are really scared off you. How do you know them?" Lucy asked.

Erza smiled at her goofily. "Eh, I don't really know them per say, but I've done quite a few jobs for some people here over the years, so those guys remember me."

"Thanks for helping me get in, but I don't know what else you guys can do at this point. My destination's house number five, right there."

The house Newkid pointed to was big, blue, and beautiful. It stood three stories high, with elegantly carved ivory rose and tiger motifs. "Oy, that is definitely not a place you can go in dressed casually." noted Loke. He addressed everyone else. "Find him a place to change. I'll be right back." His body lit up, flashed, and then he was gone.

"Hm, I know just the place." Erza lifted Newkid up by the collar of his tee and dragged him to house three. House three was a green mansion, that was a bit more humble than its neighbors, but it was a bit more welcoming. There was light in the windows, a positive sign of the manors residents being active.

Erza rang the doorbell, a minute later a well dressed gentlemen with a towel wrapped over his arm answered. "Can I help you?" he asked.

"It's me, Claude." Erza stepped into the light so the gentlemen could get a better look at her.

His eyes widened, "Lady Scarlet! I heard you had returned but to think...I shall alert the mistress of your arrival at once. Ah, do come in, your entourage as well."

"When exactly did we become Erza's entourage?" Lucy asked somberly.

The group stepped into the mansion and waited in the large foyer. In a few minutes, an older woman who appeared to be in her mid fifties elegantly strolled down the steps of the great hall. She was tall and dignified, clothed in a rich turquoise gown with jade trimmings, age was slowly creeping into her face, and her hair which was once a forest green, had begun the slow process of turning white. But her hazel eyes, full of warmth and welcome cut through all that, inviting the motley crew before her as though they were all old friends.

Erza gave this woman a polite bow with her arm crossed against her chest, "Lady Emeril, it's been awhile."

"Erza, it's wonderful to see you again." Lady Emeril approached Erza and gave her a sweet greeting kiss on the cheek. "Everyone speculated that you and your colleges perished on Tenroujima. After all these years, I was inclined to believe them. I'm fortunate to have been proven wrong." She spoke with the finery and formality one would expect from an aristocratic women, but the welcome smile she gave proved that her soul was full of life. Lady Emeril looked past Erza to see the rest of the Fairy Tail members behind her. "I see you've brought your fellow mages with you." She looked down to see Erza clutching Newkid by his collar. "And who's this?" She asked.

Erza lifted Newkid up, hanging him by the collar of his t-shirt. "This is the reason I'm bothering you at this hour. You see this boy has a formal dinner to attend in this neighbourhood, and obviously he can't show up looking all bruised and beaten. So I was wondering if you would let us use your bathroom to help him freshen up."

"Oh, the poor dear. What happened?" Lady Emeril asked.

"He got ambushed by four older boys." Erza replied.

"You should have seen him." Natsu said. "He tried to take them all on at once!"

"Natsu, you're being too loud," Lucy admonished.

Newkid, in the meanwhile, was too embarrassed to say anything. But in his mind, he was reeling, all he could think was, "I'm gonna kill these people. I'm gonna kill these people. I'm going to fucking jail, because I am going to fucking KILL these people!"

Lady Emeril then looked him over, then nodded. "Well, I'll concede that it is an unusual request. However since Erza requested it, and since this boy clearly needs a bath..."

"Who asked you lady!?" Newkid thought while she was speaking.

"Claude!" Lady Emeril called.

The butler arrived almost instantly. "You called, madame?"

"Escort Miss Scarlet and her young charge to the washroom, if you would be so kind."

"Of course, madame. This way now." the butler motioned.

Erza followed him, towing Newkid with her as she gave one glance back to the Fairy's. "Behave yourselves. Lady Emeril is a friend and great patron of the guild."

"Friend yes, patron not so much," Lady Emeril said.

"We'll discuss those matters later. For now, though, this one needs a bath."

Claude the butler lead Erza upstairs, while Newkid stewed at the fact that he was being dragged around in such an undignified manner, finally he snapped. "SERIOUSLY, HOW LONG DO YOU PLAN TO DRAG ME AROUND LIKE THIS? I'M NOT A FREAKING RAG DOLL!"

"Oh, I'm sorry!" Erza said. Then she lifted him up and started carrying him in her arms, like a baby. "Is this better?"

"I'M NOT A BABY! I'M TWELVE YEARS OLD DAMNIT!"

"Cheh, such foul language, I might just have to wash that mouth of yours, too."

"The washroom, madame." Claude said, presenting an ornate but otherwise ordinary door.

"Thank you, Claude. That'll be all." She walked into the bathroom with Newkid in her arms.

Newkid tried to protest. "Hey wait a minute..." But the door was already shut and locked.

The bathroom was a luxurious site. The floor was composed of tiles made of green granite, the toilet matched it, and it had two sinks that were like giant punch bowls made of glass that was stained green, the spouts of these sinks poured like pocket sized waterfalls. But the bathtub was the main attraction of this room. The bathtub was an ovular jacuzzi that took up a good third of the room, it was large enough for a party of three, and even though it was made of porcelain it had the same color and consistency as the green granite floor tiles, and installed throughout the tub's walls were jacuzzi jets.

Erza ran the tub, then turned her attention back to Newkid, who for obvious reasons was very uncomfortable at the moment. So uncomfortable, he started to get mouthy. "Ok, first all I don't need a bath, second I can bathe myself. There's no reason for you to be here."

"Oh, really? Then who would help you scrub your back?" she asked mockingly. "Now let's get you out of those rags." Erza began unceremoniously stripping Newkid down, while he struggled in vain.

"Gah, help, help, I'm being molested!" He yelled as Erza ripped his pants off.

"Quit your bellyaching! It's a bath, not a torture session."

Newkid was now nude, and backed against the wall, he crossed his arms over his body. One hand covering his genitals, the other arm was used to cover his chest.

Erza looked at him with an eyebrow raised, "Ok, I get why you're covering your lower half, but why are you covering your chest, you're not a girl. Are you?"

"I'm a boy you armoured she-devil!"

The tub was now filled to the brim with steamy water. "Oh, the baths drawn. Come on."

"Hell no!"

She sighed. "I guess I have no choice then." Erza's body glowed for a minute, then she went from wearing her usual Heart Kreuz armour, to wearing a revealing two piece black bikini, that really showed off her assets.

Newkid's eyes popped and jaw dropped. "HAWWW!"

She didn't register his surprise-or more likely pretended not to-and continued talking like he was still fully functioning. "One of the things parents do for their kids is bathe with them. But since you never had parents you were deprived of that experience. So I'll help you make-up for it by being your mother tonight."

"I'm pretty sure mom's don't wear bikini's in front of their sons while their naked."

Erza picked Newkid up in her arms, pressing him to her chest. "Hush now, let mama take care of everything."

Normally Newkid would have argued, but at the moment he was in the process of entering heaven via the two soft smooth pillows on Erza's chest.

Erza looked at Newkid's content face, and giggled gingerly. "The power of the boobs, it never fails," she thought to herself. She stepped into the hot bath, Newkid in her arms, and serenity washed over them both.

"Oooh," Newkid groaned. The hot water, given pressure by the jets, seemed to simultaneously massage and boil all his pain and troubles away. This combined with the amazing comforting feeling he received from Erza's breasts, allowed him for once to truly relax. And Erza almost as if to add to this started gently rubbing his head in a soothing manner. "This boy lives a tough life. Some think that constant struggle toughens a person, and that is true, but everyone needs, everyone deserves a few minutes of rest."

Newkid's eyelids began to droop, and then they closed, in a moment he dozed off peacefully. Erza looked at his sleeping face, combed her fingers through his scraggly dark hair and smiled. "He really is a cutie. I'm sure if he'd given it some time and a chance, a nice family would have picked him up. Though I gotta admit I do admire his drive to be independent. Still..." She hugged him, "...no one should have to go through life without ever knowing a parent's love. That's why I don't care whether or not anyone else thinks this arrangement is weird, he needs this, that's what matters most right now."

* * *

Meanwhile, the rest of the Fairy Tail gang was enjoying tea and biscuits in the parlor, and surprisingly enough they were behaving. Well, mostly, Natsu and Happy scarfed down the biscuits like wild animals, but Lucy daintily drank her tea. Lady Emeril sat across from them in a lavished armchair.

Lucy decided it would be good to make conversation. "So, Lady Emeril, how do you and Erza know each other?"

She sipped her tea before answering. "Well, as Erza mentioned earlier. I used to be a great patron of your guild. Many of the requests I made were of the so called S-Rank variety. Erza was always the one who responded to my requests. At first it started as a simple business relationship. However, she often helped me to resolve some of my more...personal dilemmas. As such we became good friends, and I became her exclusive client. However, then along came that business with Acnologia, of which I'm still not fully informed, and she disappeared along with all of Fairy Tail's main figures. Since Fairy Tail no longer had any S-ranked wizards, I had to turn to other guilds to fulfill my requests. Now I depend on Sabertooth to handle matters for me. They yield results, but they're not nearly as friendly as Erza. Anyway that time is past, now that Erza has returned, I'm certain Fairy Tail will return to its former glory."

Natsu stopped scarfing down biscuits long enough to make a comment. "Hey, green lady! Erza's not the only strong wizard in Fairy Tail, you know."

"Natsu!" Lucy admonished. "Erza said to behave."

Lady Emeril sipped her tea and said nothing. There was awkward silence in the room for a minute before there was a sudden flash in the room, and Loke reappeared from the Celestial Spirit world. He was now fully dressed in his suit, but his hair was still short and spiky. Slung over his back was a suit carrier. "Oh, Loke! You're back."

"Mhm, and I have a suit that's just about the kids size, where is he by the way?" Loke asked.

"Oh Erza's giving him a bath right now," Lucy answered.

All was silent for a moment, as Lucy's words reverberated through Loke's brain. "Erza's giving him a bath. Erza's giving him a bath. Erza's giving him a bath...bath...bath."

"THAT LUCKY BASTARD!" Loke screamed at the top of his lungs, and ran for the bathroom, leaving dust clouds in his wake.

A bead of nervous sweat dewed on Lucy's temple as she saw Loke boom away. "Does he even know where the bathroom is?" She asked.

"Eh, I'm sure he'll figure something out," Natsu said. "So Lady Green you got any jobs that need doing?"

Lady Emeril took another sip of her tea, "that depends are you S-Class mages?"

"Well..." Natsu was hesitant, "not officially, but I have all the skills of an S-Class mage."

"Oh, would you be so kind as to elaborate?" She asked.

"Well I'm really strong, I can even take on Erza in a fair fight. And I have the qualifications to be S-Class, that's why I was able to participate in the last S-Class exams."

"Would these be the same exams that caused Erza's dissapearance seven years ago?"

"Mhm, and let me tell you if Grimoire Heart and Acnologia hadn't shown up, I totally would have become S-Class."

She lifted her teacup to her lips, but realized it was empty. She poured her teapot into her cup and realized that it too was empty. "Claude," she called.

"Yes madam?" Claude was by her side almost instantly.

"Fetch me some more Tieguanyin" she requested.

"My apologies my lady, but I fear we are fresh out of Tieguanyin."

"What!?" The shock exploded onto her face like a lightning bolt.

"I used the last of it on this pot, I'm sorry."

A melancholy aura weighed down on her, and she began to sulk.

"Hey there's no need to get upset it's just tea," Lucy said.

Claude haughtily informed her, "I'll have you know young lady this tea costs one million jewel a pound."

Her eyes shot from her skull, "What!? I just drank one million jewel tea!?"

"Not just any tea," Lady Emeril started, "this is Tieguanyin, the greatest and most expensive tea in the world. It's herbs are grown on steep mountain slopes, and thus are extremely difficult and dangerous to plant and harvest. Claude place an order for some more immediately."

"Actually my lady, I placed an order for another shipment just last week, but it would seem that the grower has been unable to deliver do to bandits."

"Have they been robbed?" Lady Emeril asked.

"No, but they are quite worried they will be, bandits have been plundering merchants on their trade routes for some time now," Claude explained.

"I cannot allow this to stand, I get very irritable without my precious Tieguanyin." Lady Emeril looked at the Fairy Tail bunch, "it seems you are in luck. I have a job for you."

Natsu was ecstatic. "Alright! Let's hear it."

"I want you to head to Nasuli Mountains in south Fiore, and oversee the transport of the next shipment of Tieguanyin."

"Sounds straightforward enough," Natsu noted, "what do we get for it?"

"Five-hundred thousand jewel, and opportunities for higher level work in the future."

"I like it, consider the job done, let's go Lucy," Natsu was about to grab Lucy's hand and bolt, when Erza's voice rang out. "Everyone come out here now!" She was calling from the mansion's foyer.

Everyone walked out from the parlour to see what the fuss was about. They saw Erza and Loke standing in the middle of the foyer. Newkid wasn't visible but his voice was audible, "I look stupid!" he said. His voice was coming from up the stairs.

"No, you don't, you look absolutely dashing, and you're gonna knock that girl dead, now get done here young man," Erza said this with a calm tone.

"NO!" Newkid yelled.

Erza's anger flared, and a red aura of rage surrounded her, her voice projected and expanded as if it belonged to a behemoth, "I SAID GET DOWN NOW!" Erza didn't like being disobeyed.

"Alright, alright! Geeze!" From the corner of the top of the stairs, a single black shoe inched out, followed by a leg, and then the rest of the body. And a dashing little man stood at the top of the stairs. His black suit was clearly tailor made, it's exquisite stitching and fabric could have only been done by the hands of celestial spirits. The suit sported gold trimmings, and a matching gold tie, complete with gold lion cufflinks. His raven hair-once tangled and scraggly-was now shampooed, conditioned, and slicked back. He walked down the steps now with no pain to impede his movements, and came to stand in front of the gawking Fairies.

"Well? What do you think?" Erza asked.

"He looks so…" Lucy began.

Loke cut in, "Handsome? Dapper? Dashing? Elegant? Aristocratic?" Loke seemed to flit from Newkid's right side to his left and right again with each new adjective that he conjured.

But Lucy finally shut him up, "He looks so...CUTE!" And she picked him up and started squeezing the life out of him like he was stuffed bear. "Oh you are going to be real lady killer tonight aren't you? Aren't you?"

Newkid lamented, "how did I get involved with these people?"

* * *

**A/N:** Ok I know I promised a fight scene this time around, but I felt a little more set up for future events in this story was necessary. If it wasn't immediately obvious Lady Emeril is going to play an important supporting role later on, which is why I saw fit to introduce her now. And besides I couldn't have Newkid going into a classy dinner looking like a street vagrant, which he technically is, but still for these kinds of dinners you gotta dress to impress. One more thing, my favorite thing in this chapter was the bath scene between Newkid and Erza, but I want to stress that there was nothing sexual about it. Before anybody starts thinking anything, Newkid will not be coupling with Erza, I mean she's technically old enough to be his mom. Oh and I just want to clarify this now, this story takes place after the timeskip but before the grand magic games, so Fairy Tail is still a low profile guild. The first arc of this story is going to take place in the time slot that the Key of the Starry Sky arc takes place in, but it will not feature that arc. (I freaking hated that arc, it was so stupid, I mean Sugarboy kicking Fairy Tail's ass with some weird gelatinous mass, what the hell was that?) Instead I will be doing my own original arc focusing on Newkid's adventures with Fairy Tail.


End file.
